Friday, June 15, 2012

A look back at the three Spider-man movies.

With the new rebooted Amazing Spider-man movie coming out in a few weeks I thought it would be worth taking a look back at the previous three movies. Specifically the biggest problem I had with them, the look. Oh sure the effects were pretty solid but I'm talking about the character and costume designs. So here's a look back and the good, the bad, and the just plain fucking gay of Spider-man 1-3.

First let's take a look at Toby McGuire as Peter Parker. I really like him in the role. He had just the right amount of mousy beta male dorkiness for Peter.

Ugh now things are coming a little unhinged for me. Hollywood always has to over design shit for a super hero movie. What sort of space age fucking fabrics are his suit supposed to be made of? Is this Spider-man or Spider-man 2099 A.D.? And what is with the raised metallic webbing? Remember this is the movie series that went with organic webbing because it's too hard to believe that a lower middle class teenager had the resources to build web shooters (fair enough) but THIS is his costume?

This is the most frustrating character design in all the movies because while it is a shitty failure of a villain design its so close to being cool. I have no problem with the armor look, Norman is a fucking billionaire after all, and the mask/helmet is pretty decent. And the glider I actually think looks pretty fucking rad. But all and all its just fucking boring. Now imagine it with say a raggedy dark purple hooded cloak on it. Would that not make it like 6 times as cool? That's just one idea, I'm sure there's other things that could be done here. I feel like this was a good foundation but that this costume just wasn't finished.

OK now we're getting somewhere. Alfred Molina was great as Dr Octopus, and those arms, well they just looked fucking amazing. The best part was they relied more on animatronics then CGI. In fact the only time they used CGI was when you saw the whole arm. So Doc Ock was easily the high point of these movies visually.

Fuck me. Things are really going off the rails now aren't they? Spider-man's black costume is one of the best fucking costume designs in comic book history. The contrast of the white eyes and spider against the flat black of the rest of it. So simple, so dramatic, so fucking bad ass. But this? This looks like the movie costume if I was watching it in black and white. Hooking the end of the legs on the spider chest embalm to make it look more aggressive is perhaps the only redeeming virtue to this failure. I hope somebody got fired over this.

Oh for the...what...why is this.....I don't...........Fuck. Just fuck. No, I want you the reader to think about all of the mother fuckers involved in making a movie. All the people involved in giving this abortion of a character design a thumbs up. Nobody stopped and said 'What a second this is the most faggoty thing in a comic book movie since 1997's Batman and Robin' Holy mother fucking shit Harry no wonder your dad was ashamed of you.

Now this I really liked, granted they didn't do anything but get a guy who looked passable as Flint Marko and put him in Sandman's signature khakis and stripped green shirt. But that's what's so great, for once they didn't Hollywood it up and over design things. And the effects for his shape shifting looked great. I loved the scene of him putting himself back together. It was actually the high point of that movie for me (not that that's saying much) If I had to nitpick it though I would want his shirt to be tighter. But that's a pretty minor thing.

I actually liked the way Venom looked. They kept the big chest and back spider and added the white webbing from the movie black costume. Other then that it's pretty much the Venom we know and love from the comic. I know a lot of people criticized Topher Grace as Eddie Brock saying he wasn't big enough but I never really considered being a big dude to be that crucial a part of Eddie's character. In fact visually the only problem I had with movie Venom was this:

He spent half the damn fight with his face uncovered. I get doing it once to show Peter who he is but like I said it seemed like most of the fight. This is again typical Hollywood bullshit, its the reason we had Peter taking his mask off during the train scene in Spider-man 2. They feel they gotta be showing the actors emoting or we won't get the full emotional impact of the blah blah blah typical Hollywood up their own ass bullshit. Also I'm not sure why the symbiot apparently turned Eddie into a vampire, but whatever.

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