Saturday, December 15, 2012

Reader Mail: What about Han Solo?

Got some reader mail today. He didn't leave a name but I'm gonna call him Rod since that was part of his email address. As to what kind of Rod, well, his yahoo name would have me believe it's of higher than room temperature and is magical in nature. However I suspect those claims are greatly exaggerated. Anyways Mr Rod sent me this email, presumably regarding my Star Trek vs Star Wars post.

Only 10 year old Star Wars fans think Boba Fett is all that cool. Most Star Wars fans will tell you Han Solo is the man. Better then anything in Trek.

Oh shit. I think, wait hang on let me check, yes it appeares that it is indeed now 'on'. Last time I established that the Borg were indeed more bad ass then Boba Fett. But now a new challanger has arisen from Lucasland. Han Solo. OK then, let's take a look at Mr. Solo.
See the problem here is everyone only thinks that Han Solo is bad ass. When in reality Harrison Ford is bad ass. Put aside Ford's charisma and what do you really have here? Same thing you had with Boba Fett, all sizzle, no steak.

I mean what did Solo ever really DO? When we first meet him he's dodging creditors like a college drop out running from a student loan. His ship is a run down peice of shit held together with duct tape and a DirecTV satilete. He stumbled into helping Skywalker and bailed at the first chance he got. He returned to shoot one ship in the final battle in New Hope. Thanks Han. Hell, in Empire he unwittingly leads everybody into a trap. "No guys it's totally cool, Lando is a stand up guy, we'll be fine"

I'm sorry but if he was so awesome he wouldn't owe half the galaxy money. He would have friends who weren't ready to sell him out at a moments notice. The competent space pirate/smuggler/whatever wouldn't be running from creditors, he would be out collecting money people owe him. Han Solo was nothing but a two bit loser who lucked into being a hero. As far as I can tell Luke would have been better off hiring the proto Bucky O'Hare known as Jaxxon.
Yeah, that's a real thing in the Star Wars universe. Jaxxon the green space bunny. Another smuggler and sometimes friend, sometimes rival of Han Solo. I bet Luke and Leia never would have had to rescue him from Jaba.


  1. Han Solo's main contribution to Star Wars was inspiring Luke Skywalker to finish his Jedi training so Luke could RESCUE Han! ;)

  2. That and getting Leia to fall in love with him, so she didn't fall in love with her brother instead. Lucas, what was that kiss?!