Friday, July 26, 2013

Bechtloff Movie Night: The Wolverine (2013)

I'm not going to go into a plot synopsis, if you're reading this I'm going to assume you've seen it and are just looking for other opinions on it. There will be some spoilers though so beware if you haven't seen it.

Alright, first let's talk about what was right with this movie. First of all Huge Jackman. That guy is phenomenal Wolverine. I really can't imagine any other actor out there right now doing as good of a job. He portrays the complicated brooding but charming, bitter but caring, character of Wolverine just perfectly and he flat out caries this film. There's no other way to put it, without him this would be an absolute disaster of a movie and I likely would have walked out before the end. Also the fight scene on the bullet train was a fantastic action sequence and set piece and was really the highlight of the film.

Now, let's talk about what was wrong with this movie. Well I could nit pick a lot of things. Like Wolverine has claws vs swords fights with ninjas and somehow his adamantium claws don't cut right through the swords. I guess maybe you could argue the swords were adamantium since the main villain was stockpiling the stuff, but that was never outright said. No, there were three major problems that I just couldn't overlook. Number one, the one villain Viper, I hated her. I hated every moment she was on screen. She wasn't nearly as sexy as the film seemed to think so her vampy seductive moments didn't work, and she had no character or motivation beyond simply being a cunt. Second the actress playing the love interest had absolutely zero chemistry with Jackman. None. I knew they would hook up as Mariko was his wife in the comics, but even knowing that it still felt like it came out of left field. Third, and this was the biggest to me, the ending. The end of this movie, much like the ending of the last Wolverine film, was filled to the brim with logical errors and nonsense. I know it's sci-fi, I know I gotta suspend my disbelief, but you gotta meet me halfway on that movie. And that means at least follow your own internal logic. If you establish the rules on how a fictional thing like adamantium works, don't throw those rules out the window later. The villain, an old dieing man in adamantium Silver Samurai armor, cuts off Wolverine's claws using an adamantium blade that's been heated. That's not how adamantium works. And he did it because he wanted to drill into the marrow to steal his healing. Couldn't you have just had him stick needles into his heart or something to do that? It would have worked just as well, would have moved the narrative forward, and wouldn't have been violating your internal logic? Also if there was a post credits scene I don't know what it was. I just couldn't bring myself to care enough to sit through the credits.

Go home Fox Studios, you're drunk. Seriously guys why can't you make a good Wolverine solo movie? You made three good X-men movies (X-Men 1, 2, and First Class). This should be easier.

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